The Internet Gone Mad: How a Few Experts Cited Something Wrong and Now Everyone Thinks Harvard Wants Kids to Do Chores

You’ve probably seen the meme.

It goes something like this: “Harvard found that the biggest predictor of success in life is doing chores as a child.”

Cue the halo lighting up your messy living room—your kids grumbling about folding laundry suddenly feels like elite education. Harvard said so!

Except … Harvard didn’t. So what is going on? 

The Meme That Just Won’t Die

An unbelievable number of Instagram “influencers” have used this “study” as the basis for a curiosity-driven reel. Sometimes it starts with a line that catches your yen for research combined with an unanswered question, like this one: 

“Harvard did a 75-year study on the connection between chores…”

The influencer has pinned the reel and used it to get likely thousands of people on her email list so she can sell them stuff, and 8.2 million people have watched her kids prepare food and push a vacuum. 

Parents love this stuff, as evidenced by the 78,000 Insta-peeps who hit the heart on that post and the 6,285 comments. Rap killed it with 406,000 likes, Greatest Reactions got 238,000 likes while Black Success Today is slacking with only 27,000. They all say the same thing, almost word for word (what happened to plagiarism??):

A long-term Harvard study spanning over 85 years has uncovered a compelling link between childhood chores and future professional success. 

Researchers found that children who participate in household tasks develop a stronger sense of self-worth and empathy, which are crucial traits for career achievement. These chores also instill a robust work ethic and enhance the ability to work well in team settings.

Additionally, a study published in the Journal of Developmental & Behavioral Pediatrics found that children who start chores early exhibit higher levels of self-confidence and life satisfaction. 

Notice the use of buzz words like “uncovered” and “compelling” and the authority-driven “researchers found,” followed by more buzz with “crucial,” “robust,” and “enhance.” Every one even follows up with study #2 just to make it more believable. 

Everyone’s Quoting It, But No One’s Citing It

But. That viral soundbite about chores and success? It’s an internet urban legend.  The supposed “Harvard longitudinal study” never actually studied chores at all.

But the influencers don’t care. 

When I tagged the worldschooling mama with the 8.2 million views on her pinned reel, sharing my own post refuting it, she didn’t respond. 

Neither did tough cop moms who shared the false study without looking it up. At least they only had 13,900 views and 500+ likes and didn’t end up selling stuff from it. The Montessori influencer with 16.8 million views on her reel based in false information didn’t either, nor did the rancher with 12.3 million views and 226,000 likes. 

They all just want us to watch their kids dust end tables, wash dishes, and pitch hay. I guess we know if they copy each other’s work, they’ll copy each other’s on ignoring the truth too. 

The most commonly repeated phrase has just been regurgitated without anyone checking sources: 

“Kids who do chores end up being more successful in life, study says.”

Those are examples of dozens if not hundreds of repeats of the same Internet myth that seemed to have taken off on Instagram in mid-2024. 

How many used AI to scrape others’ work? 

How many just saw a viral reel and replicated the idea? 

How many checked for a source? 

I know the answer to that one. Two. 

Me and Corinne Masur, Psy.D.

She wrote a breakdown in Psychology Today in December 2024. She details her search for a true 75-year or 85-year longitudinal study, from Harvard or not, that actually shows that chores correlate to either success or happiness later in life.  She couldn’t find anything. 

Neither could I. 

The Truth: What Harvard’s Longest Study Actually Found

If you want to know how it seems to have happened, I would pin part of the blame squarely on Inc.com with an article by Jeff Haden, entitled, “Want to Raise More Successful (and Happier) Kids? Harvard Research Says Give Them More Chores.” 

Thanks to Jeff, who linked to this 2008 BMJ article as his source, the entire Internet thinks Harvard says chores equal success. The full text of the article is available. I dare you: read the whole thing if you want. Or just search for the word “chores” (non-existent) or “work” (8 instances, none about actually doing work as a child.

Read the abstract, which clearly states the actual results of the longitudinal Framingham Heart Study social network, which in this case lasted 20 years: 

People’s happiness depends on the happiness of others with whom they are connected. 

It’s nothing terrible. Connection with humans makes us happier long term. 

It’s actually great news, but it doesn’t say to parents, “Give your kid chores.” The advice is more like this: 

• Get your kid out into the real world with other people, communicating and interacting. 
• Get them off their devices, and get off of your own!
• Love them hard and let them know they have a safe haven in your home where unconditional love exists. 
• Have fun together. 
• Eat family dinners. 
• Figure out relationships. 

The study doesn’t actually recommend all that … but that’s how we build real, lasting relationships, isn’t it? 

The Harvard Grant Study

Amazingly, the actual longitudinal study that everyone is trying to cite by saying either 75 or 85 years is the Harvard Grant Study, also known as the Harvard Study of Adult Development. It really is ongoing since 1938, has had four directors, and studied a group of men from Harvard but also a group of men from inner-city Boston (in the companion study). 

It also does not seem to mention chores, work ethic, or responsibility, although as Dr. Masur pointed out, the volume of data and text written about this study is massive. So maybe it’s in there … but even the current director, Dr. Robert J. Waldinger, doesn’t think it’s important enough to mention in his TED talk. 

He says, “The lessons aren’t about wealth or fame or working harder and harder. The clearest message that we get from this 75-year study is this: Good relationships keep us happier and healthier. Period.”

He goes on to talk for 12 minutes about relationships and never mentions work ethic, chores as a child, or anything remotely related to what the Insta-memes are touting. He and his colleagues also don’t mention anything about childhood responsibility in this lengthy podcast transcript. 

How This All Got So Twisted

Speaking of TED talks, I believe that’s where the other half of the blame for the Internet urban legend belongs, with Julie Lythcott-Haims’ acclaimed TED talk. I watched it multiple times as I prepared to interview her on my podcast and of course never questioned her sources. I know that the TED platform has a whole team of people who supposedly rigorously check sources. I’ve heard from TEDx speakers whose talks weren’t allowed on the TED platform because their sources were being checked and doublechecked. 

The sources on the TED talk page include a 2003 book called The Childhood Roots of Adult Happiness: Five Steps to Help Kids Create and Sustain Lifelong Joy, the five steps being connection, play, practice, mastery, and recognition. Sure, the Amazon description mentions chores, but guess what? This book also more strongly recommends connection and relationships over instilling work ethic and discipline, AND its citations do not include the Harvard Grant Study. Strike out for Harvard and chores—again. At least Julie includes that the primary discovery of the Harvard Grant Study was that children needed love.

It feels insane that the TED staff would have missed this one … I desperately want to believe the that best longitudinal study from Harvard demonstrated the benefits of chores! 

But it doesn’t. 

I watched reel after reel of kids cutting up fruits and veggies, feeding backyard chickens, folding laundry, and sweeping floors. My emotions were all stirred up, which is the point of scrolling social media rather than studying research. 

Of course I went looking for the actual study (because nerd alert, I love digging into real research), and what I found was not what I expected.

If you search for primary source citations, you find yourself in an endless loop of one blog post linking to a more authoritative sounding article which then links to another article that mentions the study, and sometimes you’ll find a link TO the main Harvard Grant Study, but there’s not actually a summary of research on the site—so that’s just a writer trying to look like they’re citing a primary source instead of the other author’s article that they skimmed. Most of the authoritative articles quote Julie Lythcott-Haims, looping back to the original twist.

Maybe the Harvard study somehow has chores buried in there. Maybe Julie Lythcott-Haims and TED did their research and have access to more tools than I do. But I cannot replicate it at the moment, and I’m frustrated by the superficial repetition that I see on social media. I think most influencers don’t care if what they’re parroting is true or not, as long as it gets views.

So … Do Chores Matter at All?

But don’t despair!

There IS real research showing that chores are helpful! (But it’s usually not from Harvard, not longitudinal, and simply doesn’t align with what everyone is saying.)

Other researchers have looked at chores and the data is clear: kids who do them regularly show better relationships, stronger self-confidence, higher life satisfaction, and even better academic outcomes.

Here’s one from the Journal of Developmental and Behavioral Pediatrics that compares the frequency of chores in kindergarten with a bunch of metrics in third grade—hardly the famed “childhood chores equates to success in adulthood,” but at least we know that four years after doing some chores, kids rate their own social, academic, and life satisfaction competencies higher than those who don’t do chores. 

Man, that just doesn’t have the same ring to it, does it? I can see why all the meme-ers just say “Harvard discovered!” and “success in adulthood!”

If you really want some bedtime reading that won’t cause insomnia, here’s another bit from the same study: 

“Compared with children who regularly performed chores, children who rarely performed chores had greater odds of scoring in the bottom quintile on self-reported prosocial, academic ability, peer relationship, and life satisfaction scores. Performing chores with any frequency in kindergarten was associated with improved math scores in the third grade.”

I mean, it’s exciting if you ponder it, but SNORE, SNOOZE, boring!

Another study also shows that chores matter, but try fitting this on a square-shaped meme:

A University of Minnesota study “determined that the best predictor of young adults’ success in their mid-20s was that they participated in household tasks when they were three or four. However, if they did not begin participating until they were 15 or 16, the participation backfired and those subjects were less ‘successful.’ The assumption is that responsibility learned via household tasks is best when learned young.”

I can still make a feel-good reel with kids cleaning the house, serving veggies, and tending to animals, but I can’t use big numbers like 85 years, since this study only observed 84 participants four times for about 20 years.  

What Actually Predicts Success?

This article in Integrative and Complementary Therapies reveals a greater cross-section of findings from the Harvard Study of Adult Development, including, “Openness to new experiences as a young adult and lifelong psychosocial growth were predictive of wisdom in old age, while emotional stability and extraverted personality were predictive of well-being in old age.” 

Still. Nothing. About. Chores. 

It’s not about the vacuuming—it’s about what chores teach. That they’re capable. That they matter. That they’re needed in their family community.

And guess what else builds that family connection and a sense of capability?

Yep. Learning life skills together.

Want Kids Who Thrive in the Real World?

That’s why I’m so passionate about our #LifeSkillsNow summer camp. Our camper families tell us the week of camp leads to:

• The best dinner conversations of the year
• Kids proudly making healthy meals
• Sibling cooperation instead of squabbling (well… less squabbling)
• Real bonding—not just screen time side-by-side
• Not to mention cleaner rooms. (You’re welcome.)

So if you’re looking for that secret sauce to raise successful kids, start here: love them well, spend time together, and yes, give them meaningful work to do.

If you missed #LifeSkillsNow summer camp, there’s still time to get our workshops!

Don’t miss out! Get our Household Skills Mastery Mini-Series!

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